The Sportzal suckdown

I've been to a fair few gyms in my time and seen some fairly interesting things, especially in Moscow, although never anything too crazy. I think about the weirdest it got was when I was forced into an impromptu pose-down with a guy in the locker room to see who was more ripped. You can read about it here

                                                                                     naturally I won

On a side note, after so many years of training, I should really be like the 5’7 manlet version of Hulk Hogan by now, although my hulk status is most definitely lacking. Frankly, I wouldn't even be fit to ride shotgun in hulk’s papuse.
Manlet papuse traveling aside, last week was when what I call the sportzal suckdown happened.

Being the super tough, handsome real muzhik that I am, I train Muay Thai. I could write a whole post on my instructor - he’s a Russian Moldovan and allegedly rails at least two new girls each week. Also, he once claimed he has boned over 1000 women.

                                                                                   that's right

What makes things more interesting is that he is massively religious and believes (literally) in bible stories which has lead my friend to nickname him the religious babnik - even more hilarious when he calls him it to his face, which he does on the reg. Hilarious moral contradictions aside, the last lesson was pretty normal - until the end that is.

As usual, I was doing some heavy bag work at the end of the session when a girl came in. Now; the ‘thai box' room (that is also the yoga, shaping, fitness etc room) is separate from the main gym. I’d seen this chick sucking face with my trainer before and I think she’s a kind of gym slut that sleeps with all the trainers. A couple of times he's even brought chicks from the internet to the lessons. They just sit there and watch. It is a bit strange, but quite hilarious. As for this chick that shows up sometimes, I’d like to say she has the face of a chelyabinsk factory worker that moonlights as a logger on the weekends, but sadly, she’s actually pretty decent looking.

Anyway, I’m busy on the bag when I notice a strange silence, I stop to catch my breath when I notice in the mirror that she is actually sucking off my trainer. not knowing what to do, I carried on working the bag for another five minutes until the weirdness had become too much.
I looked at my trainer, who was wearing the expression of a small child who was doing something extremely naughty, and did the only thing i could

                                                     i have him a massive thumbs up

She had kind of stopped by this time so I swooped in to get my bag that had been right next to the area of sin they created. Apart from being a gym slut, she must also be one of those girls who gets off on other people watching, just like in the movies, or should I say, just like on the redtube...
The weird thing about this is that, for some reason, I was the one who felt awkward - not the girl giving head in the gym and not the guy getting Clintoned. must be the English reserve...

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